Lately I’ve been strongly debating whether or not I should delete my Facebook page. Each time I’m about to delete it, I see photos or a family member that I’ve just connected with and I’m like oh no, too much beauty and so many memories, save it. I’ve honestly only gotten into social media in an attempt to be, well, more social. However, I feel in a way, it has backfired.

First off let me just put it out there that aside from my Tumblr page, each of my social media accounts were made by other people. During my freshman year of high school a cute guy in my class (that I’d kind of hit it off with) made me a Myspace page in our computer class. He decided to do so so we could stay in touch in case we didn’t have any classes together the next year. And because he couldn’t believe I was a high schooler not on Myspace. I mean, he could’ve just asked for my number and we could’ve stayed in touch that way, but whatever. I ended up agreeing and fell into the Myspace crowd.

The same thing occurred when it was time for me to go off to college. This time a close female friend who was like a big sister to me made my Facebook page. This time it took me awhile to really get into it. I was still holding on to Myspace. I’d gotten so used to changing my background and adding what I thought were the dopest songs on a hidden playlist. Eventually, that all got played out for me, and my Facebook usage slowly crept up.

Anywhos, now I’m feeling those feeling of needing to be free from it all. There’s so many other things I can do when I find any ounce of downtime. Write. Read. Workout. What was once a fun way to pass time has become just so blah. It seems the negative posts outnumber the positive ones. The only difference in deleting my Facebook page in comparison to my Myspace page is the connections and networking I’ve been able to do. Business and education always comes first for me. For whatever reason I feel if I delete my page I’ll miss out on some opportunities.

As of today, I’ve made up my mind that come summer it’s out of here. I mean I have a Twitter (which I barely use). That can somewhat be my social connect.

I’m a phone call, send me a text and lets meet-up kind of lady. When I do interact I like real life up-close and able to touch interaction. So mid-June I’ll finally be saying bye-bye to my Facebook page after 6 years. R.I.P.

About two weeks ago I finally gave into my curiosities after speaking with a friend K about dating apps. A few friends had mentioned their hook-ups, their new-found boos, and recent hangout buddies were all products of a dating app. I'd been on the fence about signing up to use any of the applications for many reasons. The main reasons I stayed clear of them are I was not looking for a relationship nor was I looking for relations. While I enjoy meeting people while I'm out-and-about, lets be honest, I'm a bit socially awkward. I've been bored with my social life and decided I needed to meet new people, but with my schedule it's a bit difficult to do so while in route to work, volunteering or the gas station.

K had mentioned the guys she's met, all of the interesting conversations and people she's encountered. Who knew?! I just knew she was an outwardly social person who attracted people without the aid of dating apps (and she does). After talking to her and really realizing how dry my line has been I said fuck it, why not? Only thing is, a part of me knew why not. I'm uneasy when guys are too aggressive and I get bored if the conversation lags or after awhile a guy doesn't show some kind of interest (not sexually). Anywhos so far here are my thoughts on the sites I've tried out.

Tinder: DTF?
From all of the stories I've heard, I immediately knew Tinder wasn't for me, EVER. I was told no one looks for love or anything aside from a new fuck on Tinder. Um, I'm not interested in participating in speed-date-like one night stands. I'll pass. I think I used this one for about two or three days. The conversations were pretty wack, aside from one guy who I happened to have gone to high school with. Most of the convos started off basic as hell with the generic hi how are you, why are you using this site. I just decided not to put myself through the annoyance.

Black Dating For Free: WHOMP!
This one I can't even really report on. I used it for maybe two hours and checked back after several hours and the likes where there, but it was totally off from what I sought after in the profile questionnaire. Many of the men were over 35, profile pictures were throwing me off, and to top it off you've gotta pay! What exactly am I paying for? I can find better on Facebook for free!

Meld: May be promising if I were actually seeking a relationship and/or love.
This one was like a breath of fresh air. Handsome career men (networking plus!) who had their minds made up about where they were going and what they wanted. Yas! This site allows you to look, like and all but it costs to message. Again, cheap me only seeking new conversation and possible networking wasn't with it. However, if ever I do decide to really date I wouldn't hesitate to use this site along with the old fashioned method of hanging out in certain places to meet men.

OkCupid: Fun!
So I totally did not know this was a real thing. If you are a fan of Black & Sexy TV you know what series has fun with this. K really seemed to like this one. She mentioned there were way more people on this app, so many choices and new tryings. She was right. I've experienced every type of dating app person on OkCupid; the man seeking love and marriage (I had a guy tell me he's willing to share everything -love, heart, soul- with me and we'd only said hello and what we do for a living), the man that hopes you're DTF and if not he's gonna try it anyways, the I'm too-cool for this app but obviously not because I'm always online, the man that's just recently got out of a relationship and is just seeking new fun (meaning everything opposite of the ex), the lets-meet-up-and-have-coffee-oh-you're-not-into-coffee-or-don't-want-to-meet-me-well-fuck-you guy, the I know you don't know me but give me your number let me take you out guy, and the cool down-to-earth I can actually hold a conversation man. 
I've briefly spoken to a "comedian" who pretty much disliked me after awhile because I didn't get his jokes (it's freaking messaging). I've been invited on dinner dates, some of which I've turned down (I may write more on these and my vibes of a Catfish) and a few I'm skeptical about accepting but feel I must find a spying-I-can-stay-hidden-but-close-enough friend to bring along. I've even had a guy message me "could you use some extra help w/ your bills" . . . I take it he's in the low budget porn industry seeking young females to recruit (my opinion because of course he didn't answer any of my questions). Smh a mess, but funny. The good conversations (and yes networking) has overpowered the creepily bad ones. I have found myself checking this app every 2-3 days (that's often to me) so I guess I'll continue to use it for now.

Conclusion:
All apps are shoot and miss. On each site you'll meet those who can hold conversations, those who are eager for love, those who seem to not have a care in the world and only seek hook-ups. It is what you make of it and what you want to take from it. I'm sure some of the guys I've typed words to may feel like I'm a catfish, because I won't give in to anything (phone number, date, meet up in a public place early in the day). One step at a time as I wade out of my comfort zone.

Look for a part 2 in a few weeks. Of course K knows the ins-and-outs of these apps so she's given me a few more to try out!

I get that technology is an ever changing field. I get that phones can do some pretty dope shit like organize your chaotic life, allow you to do everything hands free, remind you of daily appointments etc., but have people forgotten that they still operate as a calling device?

Call me old fashioned but I love getting calls. I enjoy being up until the wee hours just talking about real world randomness and laughing at stuff that probably isn't that funny. It seems people simply use the call button when rushed or impatient. Why is that? Has technology advanced us so far that we cannot manage a slow spell?