Lately I’ve been strongly debating whether or not I should delete my Facebook page. Each time I’m about to delete it, I see photos or a family member that I’ve just connected with and I’m like oh no, too much beauty and so many memories, save it. I’ve honestly only gotten into social media in an attempt to be, well, more social. However, I feel in a way, it has backfired.

First off let me just put it out there that aside from my Tumblr page, each of my social media accounts were made by other people. During my freshman year of high school a cute guy in my class (that I’d kind of hit it off with) made me a Myspace page in our computer class. He decided to do so so we could stay in touch in case we didn’t have any classes together the next year. And because he couldn’t believe I was a high schooler not on Myspace. I mean, he could’ve just asked for my number and we could’ve stayed in touch that way, but whatever. I ended up agreeing and fell into the Myspace crowd.

The same thing occurred when it was time for me to go off to college. This time a close female friend who was like a big sister to me made my Facebook page. This time it took me awhile to really get into it. I was still holding on to Myspace. I’d gotten so used to changing my background and adding what I thought were the dopest songs on a hidden playlist. Eventually, that all got played out for me, and my Facebook usage slowly crept up.

Anywhos, now I’m feeling those feeling of needing to be free from it all. There’s so many other things I can do when I find any ounce of downtime. Write. Read. Workout. What was once a fun way to pass time has become just so blah. It seems the negative posts outnumber the positive ones. The only difference in deleting my Facebook page in comparison to my Myspace page is the connections and networking I’ve been able to do. Business and education always comes first for me. For whatever reason I feel if I delete my page I’ll miss out on some opportunities.

As of today, I’ve made up my mind that come summer it’s out of here. I mean I have a Twitter (which I barely use). That can somewhat be my social connect.

I’m a phone call, send me a text and lets meet-up kind of lady. When I do interact I like real life up-close and able to touch interaction. So mid-June I’ll finally be saying bye-bye to my Facebook page after 6 years. R.I.P.

My best friends were met late in my life. I met my best friend and brother freshman year in high school. I’m sure we met on the school bus, but who knows how that first conversation started. We’ve had our good and bad moments. I’ve tried to kick him out after play fighting and breaking my bracelet. He’s celebrated Christmas with my family and has never forgotten it (he doesn’t celebrate holidays). He’s let me vent to him about all kinds of stuff even boys and sex and is the only person I let come at me about why I am not in a relationship and question when it’ll happen. He can be annoying, but I wouldn’t trade him for the world! Female “friends” were there, went, came and gone, but he’s remained a constant. He deals with my attitudes and isn’t afraid to (try) to set me straight. An unbreakable bond for sure.

LB is definitely one of my bestest friends and sister. Of course I looked at her freshman year of college like gosh you’re super annoying! But, like fungus, people have a way of growing on you. She’s supported me through some of my toughest times and has celebrated some of my greatest growing moments. She doesn’t sugar coat anything with me no matter how I may feel about it. That’s a real friend. She challenges me and pushes me to do more. Of course we’ve had our girl fights, females have tried to test our friendship and then some.

Although I've known some people longer and have even been through some of the craziest things (fights, rides in cop cars, family issues) these two are my "chosen family." They take the bad as well as the good, support me and push me when needed. It isn't about all they do for me, because I supply them with the same love and more. It's give and take like any other relationship. That's what real friends do for friends. Even though I still say I didn't really choose them.   :)

Why are we not doing these things daily within our communities?

This has been something I wondered about for years. I’ve witnessed every other racial community do it in all aspects from career choices to living situations and more; from white folk to Mexican people. Now, I’m not saying we in the Black African American community do not do it, but I honestly wish we did it noticeably more. Not for show, not for others, but for ourselves. I’m talking about encouraging, supporting, and uplifting one another in all [positive] things we do. Not after we have made strides and accomplished things. Not when we are in a rough patch and it just seems nice to do.

It has always struck me strange when I show support or encourage my peers in something they are pursuing or are passionate about like music or moving for better opportunities or even something like a hobby they may not have ever taken seriously I get responses like “thanks,” “really?,” or “are you serious?” Yes I’m serious. And why do I not get the same support from these same peers? We are a talented bunch in our community and some times I honestly feel we sale ourselves short. Why do we do that? Why do we act surprised when someone notices, appreciates and supports our talent?

Two real life examples: Okay, I’m a little Black girl from the hood who loves to write and who would like to have a marriage BEFORE children. I’ve heard everything (regarding my writing and my news packages) from “who knew you could talk like that/knew those big words,” “you write/sound like a white person,” or one that really shocked me, “I never knew black people liked writing, I can’t stand it.” Mind you, all of these comments came from black “friends” of mine. Hmm. Let’s continue. In terms of my views of marriage and children (for myself), I’ve heard “yeah right, you’ll be next [expecting a baby].” -_- Really though? Why couldn’t these black folks of my immediate community just uplift me? Encourage me? And support my personal decisions in MY life? What’s so hard about that? I’m confused.

Okay next example. A girl I went to high school with posted a poem/note about R&B on her Facebook page. I complimented her, because 1) I agreed/understand/feel what she was saying in her write; 2) She is my friend and I support my peeps!; 3) She is doing something positive and sharing her talent. She replied to me ” … Be having ya girl feel all talented.” Uh, yeah, it’s because you are! Was she joking with me or was she serious? Either way, why? I did not ask her whether she was or not, because my mind took off. If joking, why joke about your talent? If serious, why question someone’s support of you, especially a friend? Now I’m not bashing her at all, this just brought forward those feelings that I’ve been brushing back time and time again and got me thinking; Do we not support, encourage, uplift each other enough that when one does it is odd and foreign to us that we joke or shut it down instead of being thankful or appreciative of the love and support?